Tonight, I met some mom friend neighbors at our neighborhood pub. Of course, I brought Oren with me since he usually nurses straight through from 7-10pm. I walked into the bar with my baby in the sling, wide awake, and instead of getting the stink eye like I feared, the owner walked up and told me how cute my baby was. He then made sure the music wasn’t too loud and asked if it was disturbing Oren. Should he turn it down?
I love that I was meeting such awesome women, all of whom live within walking distance of my house, at a bar we could walk to that welcomes babies in slings. You can’t buy this sort of community. You just can’t.
Sure, my family is cramped right now. Most of our possessions are in a storage facility down by the river and we’re still cramped. We can’t lend certain books to friends because we don’t want to rummage through the book boxes in the storage unit and we can’t host potlucks past September because, well, we don’t have enough space. But boy do we have a community here in this neighborhood.
Sometimes I think we could just chuck it all and build the same sort of thing in whatever new neighborhood we find with a big enough house in our price range, but why would I do that? Why would I give up the fish fries and ability to walk into a bar with my babies and meeting friendly faces to pick up litter on Earth Day? I have neighbors whose parents fly in from Argentina and just love babies, so they made us pans of lasagne when Oren was born in exchange for sniffing his bald head.
I personally would be very happy to cull most of my possessions so we would better fit in this house. Of course, my spouse is less enamored with the idea of minimalism and my kids want to own both a Brio and a Lego collection, so the search continues. But I’m very happy to wait and see and take our nightly walks around the block, pointing out all the houses that would be big enough for our family.
As our house search drags on into fruitlessness, I worry often about what we should do. How long should we hold out and wait for the right house to open in our neighborhood before we give up and buy a house in another neighborhood? And then something happens like tonight, where I walk into the neighborhood joint and see friendly faces and feel enveloped by the 15206, and I know the answer is as long as it takes.